No, not this time
by RebuiltGolem74
Summary: Set during episode 3x17. Ava walks away from Sara, but Sara goes after her. Things get said and happy times ensue. Not really good at summaries. Hope you like it.


NO, NOT THIS TIME

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"There is no me to love," said Ava stepping through the portal. Sara could feel the walls building back up around her heart. She wanted so badly to tear those old walls down, but here she stood on the Waverider watching the one person who could shatter those walls walk away from her. She made the mistake once, she couldn't do it again. "No, not this time. Gideon open me a portal to the Time Bureau." "Do you think that is wise Captain?" asked Gideon. "Please Gideon. I can't let her walk away from me again." "Right away Captain." Sara stepped through the open portal, searching the building for Ava. Sara found Ava in her office, watching for a moment as she noticed the tears streaming down Ava's face. Sara's heart broke a little more.

Sara quietly knocked on Ava's office door, hoping she wouldn't turn her away. Ava opened the door surprised to see Sara standing on the other side. "What are you doing here Sara?" said Ava wiping her tears away. "Can I come in?" Ava moved to the side letting Sara step inside the office. "What do you want?" "I need you to listen, Ava." "I can't right now Sara. I need you to leave," replied Ava. Sara held her hands up. "No Ava. Not this time. You are not going to push me away." "Why Sara? You pushed me away not two weeks ago. First, you break up with me because you think I can't handle it. Then you tell me just a few minutes ago that you love me. What am I supposed to think? You know what I think? I think the reason you broke up with me is because you're afraid. You're afraid of letting me in because you don't want to hurt me, but you have already hurt me by letting me go. You don't think I can handle it, that I can handle you. Trust me, I can handle anything that you throw at me. I've never wanted you to be anyone other than you. But you broke my heart Sara. I don't know what to do with that. I don't know what to feel," replied Ava, tears flowing down her face.

Sara's eyes began to fill with tears. She was so afraid of hurting Ava, she didn't realize breaking up with her would hurt her more. She walked closer to Ava. Ava retreated a little. Sara stopped, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "I'm so sorry Ava. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, but it seems I have hurt you anyway. But I need you to listen to me. You're right, I did push you away and it was the worst mistake I ever made. I let you walk away once, I'm not going to let you walk away again. I realize that breaking up with you was a huge mistake. You are the one person who can save me from myself. Yes, I was afraid, afraid you'd see the real me and run. Honestly, I'm still afraid. I can't promise you I won't hurt you, but I will try my best to make you feel important and loved. These feelings I have for you are new to me. Sometimes I don't know what to do with them. For so long I have built walls around my heart. I've always been the one to break hearts, but for the first time, I am afraid that you could be the one person who could break my heart. That scares the hell out of me. It was always so much easier to close myself off to love. Love was a weakness that got people killed, especially by me," said Sara moving closer to Ava. This time, Ava didn't move away from her. "Until I met you, I never knew what love really was. I never knew I could love until you came into my life. I know what it feels like to be disconnected, to feel like you don't belong. Each time I have been resurrected, I lost a little piece of myself. But you Ava, you are the missing piece. You are the one person who can help me heal. You may be a clone but that doesn't mean that you can't feel, that your feelings aren't real. I don't care if you are a clone or not. To me, you are perfect."

Sara placed a hand on Ava's cheek, wiping away her tears. Sara took Ava's hand and placed it over her heart. Ava felt Sara's fast heartbeat. "This is what you do to me. You make me want to be a better person. I love you Ava. I need to let myself forget about my past and focus on the future, our future, together. Nothing you can do or say will make me stop loving you." Ava looked into Sara's eyes, believing every word Sara said. "Do you really mean that?" "Every word," replied Sara. "Good," said Ava smiling. "I love you too." Sara smiled as she leaned in to kiss Ava. The kiss deepened. Before they took it too far, Sara broke the kiss. "Let's get out of here. There's a spot in my bed waiting for you," replied Sara. Ava smiled as she opened a portal to Sara's room. Ava began to kiss Sara again when they stepped through the portal. Ava slowly began to work Sara's shirt off. Sara stopped her. "Hang on. I need to make sure we don't get interrupted." "Good idea." "Gideon lock the door. Momma needs a night off with a beautiful woman. Oh, and let the others know that under no circumstances are they allowed to interrupt." "Yes, Captain." "Now, where were we?" asked Sara. "I think I was about to take off your shirt," smiled Ava, slipping off Sara's shirt. "I've missed you, Sara," said Ava kissing Sara. "I've missed you too and I am sorry for breaking up with you. It was the biggest mistake of my life," replied Sara. "I forgive you, Sara." "Good." Sara leaned in to kiss Ava. "You have way too many clothes on Director Sharpe," said Sara taking off Sara's suit jacket. "So, would it be weird if I said all I want to do is make you scream my name?" asked Sara as she unbuttoned Ava's shirt. Ava looked down blushing. Ava placed her hands on Sara's face kissing her. Sara noticed Ava's eyes turn dark. "That's the best idea I've heard in weeks." Sara took Ava in her arms and kissed her hard, weeks of separation poured into the kiss. That night, Sara held true to her word, the only name Ava spoke was hers.


End file.
